Be sure to read the last chapter of Humans for next week and watch the video below. This is your last blog response for the book, and I'll give you a break next week (promise!). We'll also discuss Paper #2 next week, assuming we're able to meet in person (lots of snow predicted!). If that happens, I'll inform you of everything you need to know on the blog. Respond to the video below in a comment by your classtime next week!
Something I have heard a lot in my life that I still question to this day is the saying "Time is the only healer." Whether that be true in ones case or not, I feel like it is more so an opinion. In life we all go through heartaches and trials, but even after dealing with it for so long, it feels like in some cases the pain will never go away. I have heard plenty of songs that mention healing over time or suggesting that time is the only healer. Just over 5 years ago I lost both of my grandparents and over the past five years it hasn't gotten any easier. I feel like telling someone that something will get better over time is setting them up for false hope because in certain situations, it may never get better, because as a human, how do you know what is going to happen in the future for someone else. This myth could lead someone to think that one day in the future the situation they are in may be better but the truth is no one knows that. Someone could wake up each day for the rest of their life waiting for that pain to go away and truly, it may not.
ReplyDeleteThis is a very important remark, and an extremely mature one, too. No, you don't really get over things like this, and time doesn't 'heal' it. I think time teaches you how to live with it. But if you love someone, you never heal, you just learn to accept the pain, whether or not you ever find it necessary. I think you're right, though; there are things that you wake up thinking about every single day, and the experience is different, but undiminished. I think that definitely count as a myth since it's too scary to confront the truth...I think the little girl at the end of my video would agree with you, and would want to talk about why pain doesn't go away.
DeleteBeing younger I was excited to get older and have less responsibilities I despised such as chores and homework. Little did I know that it would only increased by the time I turned 18 with the extra stress of a job too. I know eventually I'll get to move on and take my final exams and finish my degree, But I know I'll chores forever.
ReplyDelete*have chores forever
DeleteYes, this is a great myth, since as a kid, you have your life, and then a few tiny chores are added. As an adult, ALL of life is responsibility and chores; every day, you have to do something you don't want to do and would almost kill to avoid. And yet, it has more meaning than a chore, since you see where it fits into your life. And sometimes, the chores are for bigger picture things that slowly come together over weeks, months, or years. So while work never goes away, but only intensifies, the good news is that some of it as meaningful, even beautiful, work. Eventually, you get to a point when the work you do is actually fun--you would want to do it even if you didn't have to. That's how teaching is for me: play work. I almost hate the summer since I have to "stop playing" and do the less fun work of taking care of the house, etc. I would rather teach!
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ReplyDeleteI think the greatest myth of adulthood is how everyone normalizes rushing adulthood. They're so quick to get married and start having kids so early and they're already planning on where they're gonna live in their twenties. It's like we're supposed to know what we want to do for the rest of our lives by the age of 25 and we're supposed to be ready to settle down by the age of 30. I mainly hear about this from my family, because I notice that's what almost everyone in my family has done, they got married young and their futures were just kinda planned out after they graduated high school. They never even got to leave Oklahoma and travel. I think that's why so many people have a mid-life crisis, because they rushed everything and then they realize they didn't achieve their own goals, and they never got to travel and experience new things. I think people should spend their twenties focusing on themselves first and achieving their own goals before they start making goals with another person. People get so worried that if they don't find their significant other in their twenties or thirties then they'll never find someone and they'll die alone. Who cares? Being alone has a lot of advantages, and the beginning of adulthood is where you find yourself and learn what's best for you. Patience pays, when things are rushed they aren't as good. I believe people normalize it so much because it's what society expects you to do, it's like the main purpose of life is get married and start a family. The danger of buying into it too seriously is you end up having a mid-life crisis and you hurt the people around you by deciding you want something different. Of course there's nothing wrong with living your life the way you want, I just think people shouldn't feel as pressured to settle down so quickly.
ReplyDeleteExcellent response; too many people are indeed in a rush to 'get settled,' and the myth is that you need to do that right after college (or after high school!). While some people are ready to do this, it's hardly a one-size-fits-all proposition, and as you say, these people give themselves so many responsibilities that they never have time to explore, to travel, to experiment, and to make sure this is exactly what they want. I think that we see in Humans that some people find great joy just being by themselves and learning who they are, before trying to make sense of a relationship. Because you're right--a mid-life crisis is another way of saying, "I never got to spend time with myself."
DeleteI think the biggest myth of adulthood is just simply that it's bad. From a young age we're told to enjoy being a kid while it lasts because once you become an adult, you just work your life away. My response to that is well why can't I have fun in my adulthood too? The answer to that is you can, yes things are definitely going to be more difficult and you'll have way more things to worry about, but it can still be fun. A danger to buying into this myth would be having a negative outlook on life, just living every day dreading what's to come as we grow older.
ReplyDeleteYes, great points; with increased responsibility also comes the chance for greater freedom. I think we see in Humans that some people find a way to enjoy life and try new things by simply questioning what adulthood should be. The ones who don't enjoy it seem trapped in someone else's idea of what it should be, or sometimes, because of external factors like poverty, a bad marriage, etc. But that doesn't make adulthood, by itself, a bad thing. Any more than childhood is always a great experience--I know many people hated it.
DeleteOne of the greatest myths of adulthood is the idea of having life planned and set in stone by the time one gets into college. Young adults have been conditioned to think if you do not have your life figured out you will be unsuccessful and end up at the bottom of the pyramid. All during elementary, middle school, and high school I focused on my grades and was using this to determine who I would become without putting what I truly love into consideration. When it was time to determine the rest of my life I couldn't really see anything. I was lost all senior year worried for the future and honestly scared for making the wrong choice. Adults keep on telling us this myth and I do not know why. Maybe they think it will make us become better adults but it is doing more damage than helping. One decision should not determine what is to come. You can change your mind for a better life. If younger adults buy into this, they can stop themselves for making mistakes and being restricted into one decisions outcome. Mistakes are supposed to happen. They help people learn and develop skills.
ReplyDeleteYes, this is a very wise response, and it's one of the core myths that we learn in high school: that you should have everything planned and ready to go. I think the whole idea of choosing a major when you enter college is a bad idea. It doesn't give you the chance to explore and see other things, since often times, your major is decided by other people (parents, usually) and not what you feel compelled to do. I think the myth comes from well-meaning parents who want you to be safe and secure and not waste time, and many colleges believe that if you have a major, you're more likely to remain in the college long-term. But it can be harmful, too...and it creates a lot of anxiety and a time of life that should be full of adventure and intellectual excitement.
DeleteProbably the greatest myth about adulthood that I heard growing up is that things only get harder and that once you are an adult (in college specifically), you will not have any time to do anything. If I am being completely honest, I have had more freedom and time to do what I truly want to do since starting college. Now, that is not always going to be the case, because college demands a lot of time, but if you are wise with your time, you can still enjoy life and all the little things that come with it. When I was in high school, although I did not realize it at the time but I never got to do much, it was always "focus on school or you will do bad," but that really is not the case, because I am doing well, in my opinion, while still doing the things I want. So right now, I am embracing adulthood, while still respecting the obligations that come with it.
ReplyDelete-Tori Prince
Great response--college is often what you make of it, and like anything else, if you don't develop an approach to it, the experience can become hard and out of control. But with a little attention to detail, you can balance it with the rest of your life. And it does offer a lot more freedom than high school ever did. You can totally reinvent yourself here, learn new things, and be taken seriously in a way that high school never quite allowed. That's the beauty of it--a way to liberate yourself, rather than a way to be confined (as some people continue to view it).
DeleteOne of the greatest 'myths' of adulthood, in my opinion, is the saying "and they lived happily ever after."
ReplyDeleteI don't remember the first time I heard this, but I would say it was probably in a movie when I was younger.
I think people keep telling this 'myth' because they wish it were true.
Some dangers of buying into this myth too seriously might be that you wouldn't be prepared and you may expect things to be perfect, when in reality, things are not always perfect.
-Cheyenne Adair
Yes, this is important, because we know it's a fictional statement, and yet we still strive for it, and hope it's true. So much of Facebook and Instagram are built on this premise. So many couples and families strive to make this a reality in their posts; and while people can be happy, happiness is often built on struggle and hard times, and few people post about those. So we see the "happy" without the context, which makes us doubt the struggles in our own lives. So yes, we expect things to be a certain way by a certain time, when the reality is that few people experience it this way.
DeleteThe biggest myth of being an adult is you having to be independent. This is a myth because you don't! You should never struggle in silence, always ask for help if you need it. There are adults willing to help you, no one ever said you have to struggle in silence. There are other humans on this earth for a reason. People who have either been through what you have been through, or going to go through it. You never have to go through anything alone.
ReplyDeleteGreat response: independence doesn't mean 'alone.' You can always have friends, a family, and a support network behind you. In fact, people who insist on going it alone aren't necessarily independent, but maybe too proud--or too stubborn, to accept help. They say "no man is an island," and this is true as we get older. We can't do everything by ourselves.
DeleteI think the greatest myth that I heard growing up wasn't explicitly said, but it was implied, that the job or career that you have defines you. That is often the first question that adults will ask children when they meet: What do you want to be when you grow up? I completely understand the question; it's a good conversation starter and lets you learn what kinds of things that a kid is interested in. However, the negative side is that it can put strain, especially on older kids, to feel like they need to figure out their identity and that their worth is tied to a job and a salary. I wish I had known earlier that no matter what career(s) I pursue, it doesn't put me in a box as to what kind of person I am and to what other, different experiences I can be in search of.
ReplyDeleteYes, this is a particularly nasty myth, since in America we have become defined by what we do. Our careers are our life and our identity. Which is why people often fall into a deep depression when they lose their job (not just because they lose a ready source of money). And as you suggest, it makes young people think they're nothing until they find a career path, which also makes you seem 'negligent' if you can't find one right away. But honestly, some people never settle into one career, or many people are unable to work in the career they feel best suits them. The best thing to do when you're young is to keep your options open and keep looking, and not assume you have to be this or that forever. I never intended to become a teacher in college--and it's become the most satisfying career I could imagine!
DeleteThe biggest myth that I heard growing up was that once you are older and get a job you hit a plateau and every day becomes the same routine. I heard this not from my parents but from people around the age of 30 but now that I am old enough to understand I realized that they just had a poor attitude abut life and getting older.
ReplyDeleteDylan Crook
This is a tough once, since routine is inevitable once you start doing a job or career every day, week, month, and year. So the trick is to find a job that is interesting or challenging enough to balance the potential monotony of routine. But that's not always possible. So then the trick becomes finding a way to balance a monotonous job with an exciting hobby, or quality time with your family, or something else. Being bored is a state of mind, not necessarily a state of being.
DeleteI think the biggest myth of adulthood is making you believe that it is no longer acceptable to play and have fun, once you are an adult it is looked at as odd to participate in childish activities and for you to play games and just have fun people say things like "enjoy being a kid while you can" and other things like that, that leave the impression that things have to change but they don't! you are allowed to go out and have fun with your friends when you grow up and do things like play sports or use your imagination!
ReplyDeleteYes, and we see that because even teenagers stop drawing, stop playing games, and stop doing things that every kid enjoys doing. We're pressured to 'grow up' and start being 'serious.' But fun can be serious, too. The trick is to be a responsible kid, one who can still see the fun and adventure in life, without avoiding responsibility or opportunities. It is possible!
DeleteA myth about adulthood that I believe is inaccurate is that becoming an adult needs to be a big deal where everything changes. Anything you learned in your life you did is slowly. You messed up and did something different until you got it right. For me, becoming an adult is just the next thing I am learning to do. I don't expect myself to be good at it, or know the answer for every decision I need to make. Eventually, I will find what works for me and continue to get better at it. I was always taught being on your own was a big step, and you must be prepared. I may not come home to my parents every night, but the people in my life who care about me are still there for knowledge and opinions. The danger of buying into this myth too deeply is that this expectation to know what your doing can lead to feeling the mistakes or rough times as failing completely instead of learning how to be on your own.
ReplyDeleteThat's a great point--all good things happen slowly, in a slow process of growth and maturation. That's why we never really become "adults." It happens so slowly we don't realize it, and it takes a long time to prepare for it. And it doesn't mean we stop being who we were, but we slowly change into a different form of who we were. As you suggest, you're always your parents' child, even though you grow up. And they're still your parents. You don't have to pretend that relationship doesn't exist.
DeleteI think one of the myths that I heard at home a lot was that once I became an adult, I'm thinking 18, that I will have to get a job and start paying my bills. I am almost 19 now, I have a job but I most definitely would not be able to pay for my bills with that paycheck. My parents still pay most of my bills, like car insurance, phone bill, etc. My brother is 24 years old and my parents are still paying his phone bill. I don't think I will actually have to start paying my own bills until I am moved out of the house. Depending on your parents or who you live with this myth may ring true but not for me. I am going to relish in this for as long as I can.
ReplyDeleteThis is Maggie Sawyers
DeleteThis one is tough, because that USED to be true, in a different world, under a different economy. When my parents were your age, that was still possible: you could get a job and manage to pay all your bills. But now everything costs so much more, salaries have not measurably gone up, and we need more things to survive such as cars, phones, insurance, etc. Even the groceries are more expensive than ever before! So the trick is to be as self-sufficient as you can, without being too proud to ask for help. The trick of adulthood is learning how to do the impossible as well as you can, knowing you'll never do it perfectly.
DeleteI would say the biggest myth I would say about adulthood that I heard was that after High school people will be different. Honestly they are the same you still have the cliquish groups, I will still encounter a scenario where I see people picking favorites, like teachers I had did in High School. I see people still will make up stuff about people like they would do pettily in high school. Hearing this made me get through school with the mind set that people will be different, I won't have to deal with drama or bullies. Now it may not be as bad as it was when I was in school but you will always have people who will talk badly about you. So telling kids that people will be different isn't the most honest thing to say because even if they change it might not be until late into their life. If we keep telling kids this then essentially we are guarding them from the truth that you are always going to encounter people who are mean, don't want to include you, and you may not fit into a group when you are older. You are just going to have to find your people.
ReplyDeleteThis is a tricky one, since you're right, high school behavior is a microcosm of the real world (esp. since many high school teachers go back to high school because they LOVED it, and perpetuate this very environment). But that said, a lot of high school behaviors don't work as well in college or elsewhere. I found that college was totally different than my miserable high school experience, and I was able to be myself for the first time. Not everything changes, but enough changes so that you can see the world differently, and hopefully, experiment without judgment. But this can be harder to do if you remain in the place you grew up in...ideally, in college, you're around total strangers so you can all 'start over.'
DeleteOne of the biggest "myths" I've heard about adulthood is that it is all work and no play. Meaning there is little time to do anything fun. I've heard this myth from many people including my parents and grandparents. I think most people still tell this myth to their children and grandchildren, so that they enjoy their time as kids. This can be dangerous because it can cause teens to enter adulthood with a bad opinion about becoming an adult. Thus causing them to be less productive citizens.
ReplyDelete-Braden Schroeder
Yes, great response...while there is a lot of work in adulthood, I would argue that there's also much less "busy work" than in childhood, when every grade drowns you in homework, not all of it completely worthwhile! In adulthood, at least you can pick your battles a little bit more, even if the work is harder, and sometimes, more unpleasant.
DeleteThe greatest myth of adulthood is that adulthood is at all defined. Many people are told that they have to live a certain way or do certain things but it is simply not true. There are many people who do not follow these conventional rules who are perfectly happy. In fact, these rules may even prevent some people from being happy. This myth of needing to fit a mold can be crushing and depressing for many people. For some, this may prevent happiness all together unless they break out of this mold.
ReplyDeleteI think one of the greatest myths that was implied about adulthood was that everyone had is all figured out. No one has anything all figured out, no matter their age or mindset. This is a reason why "Friends" is my favorite TV show; all of these twenty somethings are getting through life one step at a time, and have to take detours due to life happening and getting in the way. In the TV show, Rachel decides to be her own person and actually be an adult, but she doesn't know how to do ANYTHING because she never had to until then. I feel like everyone can relate to this; after high school we are just let loose into the "real world" and told good luck. For those of us who didn't have jobs in high school, this is all brand new. This is a dangerous myth to believe because absolutely no one has life all figured out. Life is supposed to be fun, not rushed.
ReplyDeleteSorry this is turned in late, I had internet problems this week.
I was told by my parents that when you become an adult you lose your freedom. I believe that's a myth, because I can do what I want when I want and no one can tell me no. If I want to travel somewhere I do it, its not hard to plan save and take off work there's always someone wanting hours. I think us adults think that adulting means not doing what makes us happy or "growing up". I pay my bills on time and save so why not reward myself. I have the freedom to be who I am with no one saying I can't. there are no limits for me now and the things I can achieve.
ReplyDeleteI think that the greatest myth of adulthood is that you have all your things together and you know what you're doing in your life. When you think of an adult you automatically think of things like independence or someone who knows what there doing. I think I have a lot of fear of having this title is I am afraid that I am missing out on some big "how to be an adult secret". I was forced to grow up much faster and had a shorter childhood than most. In this, I am really afraid that I am not doing the right things in this part of life. Or even doing something that that will hurt me in the future. I think I feel so much of this pressure because I know that my brother looks up to me. When it comes to being an adult the more I learn and talk to other adults the more I realize that we all don't know what we are doing. We are just taking it one day at a time.
ReplyDelete-Erika Lamb
I think the biggest myth is having plans for the future. I had plans because all of my friends do, and once I got to college and had to start being an adult I second guessed everything. I used to want to be an epidemiologist. I was going to get my basics done here at ECU and transfer to OSU to get my masters in microbiology, but now? I don’t even want to do anything science related. My teachers from school were the ones that made me think I had to plan everything out. I think people continue telling others to do this because they are also trying to convince themselves that its what they should do. Plans are not always the way to go, because you can’t predict everything that going to happen in the future.
ReplyDeletei big myth i hear a lot or really just seen a lot was every one having their whole life together by the time they are 25 and when I was younger that sounded pretty reasonable considering I thought if you were 25 you were already old and that's not the case. I know now that even if some people to have everything figured out right now it is okay if I don't because everyone does life different and that's okay
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